Doggy Reel Bingo, how we hate you, let us count the ways…
1. Firstly, can we talk about the eye-searing, retina-cancer-causing shade of pink that they chose for the background?
2. Who has a red dog? Are red dogs even possible?
3. The numbers are shockingly random for a bingo game.
4. There are several layers of awfulness in the design: hot pink base, scattered bones (of those who have died of the badness of this game, probably) on top of that, then a giant paw print, presumably of the red dog thing that’s the mascot. Maybe its not a red dog at all, but a white wolf-hound soaked in the blood of its enemies?
5. The word “LOSE” is directly above the name of the slot, making us think that it was a desperate plea from the designer to lose the crappy logo
6. Which has no less than three fonts, by the way
7. The actual three-reel slot is pixilated and features fruit, dog collars and dog food as the big winning symbols. We could never bring ourselves to cross our fingers and hope that dog food comes up on the reels. That’s not exactly an appealing image. Maybe it’s the only thing that the designers could afford after they’d eaten all their fruit and failed to get rich on their idea that blind people need pokies in their lives too.
8. The jackpot symbol appears to be two of the Doggy Reel Bingo logos sitting on top of each other. That’s just wrong.